Hazelnut Chai

So, remember that one time when i was all 'o look at me, im on my grown shit now'? Yea, well, there's still a lot i need to learn about this world apparently...rather, i need to accept the world for what it is. And by that i don't mean i'll stop inflicting my love on everyone in hopes people will follow suit, i just mean i need to be realistic (what a horrid word lol). I'm thankful though...i'm thankful that i'm surrounded by people who love me back. And, if i've learned anything from this bergamesh (don't worry, i just made that up), it's that i need to be thanking my stars. Everytime i compare my life to those of people who... people who don't live but barely survive, i am truly saddened. While i am aware of my blessings... i feel i don't deserve them...atleast not all of them. Its not fair that i have parents who'd do anything for me when other folks mom'd sell them into prostitution and its not fair that i don't have to visit the grave of possibly the only person i loved and its not fair that my uncle never thought of raping me and its not fair that i dont have to think about where im gonna sleep tonight or what im gonna eat tomorrow and its not fear i have the audacity to starve myself on purpose and its not fair that i can sit here and type on this mac computer and its not fair that im not forced to see the world without eyes and its not fair that i can say 'i love homosexuals' and not be stoned for it and its not fair that i have the heart to love and love hard because it hasnt been torn apart too bad and its not fair that that kid just died and its not fair that the other kid just shot him cuz he needed the money in the other kids pocket to feed himself and its not fuckin fair that a country that was already the second poorest country in the western hemisphere is now fucked out of their mind and its not fair that some people are too fucking ignorant to realize haitis been fucked for a while now and we the people supply the lube and its not fair that i will wake up tomorrow morning because its already written that i will and its not fair that i cant just travel the world and show people its all a lie and they need only to love cuz thats all that matters. rather, its not fair people wont listen to me.